- Returning to work after becoming a first-time mother can be emotionally and physically challenging, despite efforts to stay connected during maternity leave.
- Many mothers leave their jobs within a year of returning due to insufficient workplace flexibility and support.
- Supportive policies, open communication, and recognising the strengths gained through parenting can help mothers continue to succeed in their careers.
I’ve written many articles throughout my career. Technical pieces, market insights or commentary on industry trends. But writing this one feels different. In fact, it feels almost alien. Why? Because this time, I’m writing about myself.
For International Women’s Day, I wanted to speak honestly about returning to work after becoming a first-time mother. Not because I have the perfect recipe for success, far from it, but because I vividly remember those first months back. The bleary eyes. The emotional turmoil of leaving your child. The sense that I had to come back to work as the exact same person I was when I left. I remember thinking: why is nobody talking about how hard this is?
So I made myself a promise: however uncomfortable it might feel, I would speak openly about my experiences. If sharing even one story helps a woman who wants to stay in work see that it’s possible, not just to remain, but to thrive, then the vulnerability of writing about myself is worth it.
The reality of returning
Before coming back, I thought I was prepared. I’d stayed close to the team, dialled into key meetings, and even joined the odd social event. But when I returned, the reality hit differently. The emotional weight of leaving your child. The physical exhaustion of sleepless nights (which, despite my initial optimism, did not magically resolve itself when I returned to work). The unpredictable brain fog can make even simple tasks feel uphill. The new juggle of drop off and pick up.
Suddenly, the stories I’d heard about mothers who wanted to continue their careers but ended up stepping back, or not returning to work at all, started to make sense.
What does the data say?
More than a quarter of mothers in the UK leave their jobs within a year of returning from maternity leave. Many cite lack of flexibility as the reason, not a lack of desire or ambition – but a lack of support.
The data goes further. Mothers’ earnings fall dramatically and stay lower for years after having a child, largely due to stalled progression or deliberate downshifting to roles that allow for flexibility.
This is not simply a personal challenge for the people involved. When those who want to stay in work are not supported, it produces a loss of talent, perspective and leadership that impacts a business’ bottom line.
Companies that design for life events protect their leadership pipelines, reduce attrition, and strengthen diversity of thought. Flexibility elevates standards by unlocking workforce potential. If we want diverse leadership, we need workplaces built for real lives – not idealised ones.
What helped me
Every journey is personal, but these are the things that made my own return to work not just manageable, but empowering.
- Supportive company policies
The most important of them all. I’m fortunate to work for a company that supports returning parents through flexible working options. I returned initially on three days a week and later moved to compressed hours – an arrangement that allowed me to stay fully engaged in my role and spend more time with my child.
Flexibility must work for both the individual and the organisation, and it naturally evolves. What someone needs in the early years of parenthood may look very different a few years later. The goal isn’t to lock in one arrangement forever, but to keep having open, honest conversations about what’s sustainable, fair, and works for the individual, their team, and the business.
- Asking for what you need
We often self-police before anyone else has said a word. We second-guess whether we’re asking for too much, worried we’ll seem less committed. But if flexible hours help you perform at your best, and ensure you still meet business needs, then it’s not only reasonable, it’s favourable. When people design their working patterns thoughtfully, productivity often improves.
- Advice I’ll never forget
Before I went on leave, a senior leader told me: “You don’t need to prove yourself again when you come back. You’ve already done that.”
I didn’t realise the power of that statement until I came back to work. It gave me permission to be confident in the value I bring. A reminder that working differently is not the same as working less.
- Realising that juggling is a superpower
People joke about ‘mum skills,’ but parenting can sharpen prioritisation, resilience, efficiency, and emotional intelligence. You don’t lose capability when you have a child – you gain a different set of priorities and qualities that can add enormous value at work.
- Letting go of perfection
Many women in our industry are perfectionists. I certainly was. But returning to work taught me the value of “good enough.” Not mediocre – just human. Some days, good enough is exactly what keeps everything moving: work, family, and your own well-being.
There is no right way to navigate work and parenthood. Some women want to return full-time, some prefer part-time, and some choose not to come back at all. Each one of those decisions is valid and personal.
But they should be just that: choices. True inclusion gives people the flexibility to design the balance that’s right for their family, their ambitions and the business.
If sharing my perspective gives even one woman the confidence to advocate for herself or champion the women beside her to push for the career she wants, then writing this article has been worth it.
